The recent years have seen the fetish, kink, and BDSM community grow, not only online but also in real life. These mostly include consensual violence with both physical and psychological domination, masochism, and submission.
These are the main reasons why society is skeptical of this community. However, BDSM is not for everyone. It offers a lot of possibilities, making it easy for people who want to explore the different aspects of their sexuality.
The online presence of this BDSM community has become more active in the last few years, making it more accessible to those willing to explore their sexuality and preferences. And here comes one of the online platforms, Fetlife. So, what is Fetlife?
What is Fetlife?
Fetlife.com is a website that also has come up with an app that describes itself as “The Social Network for the BDSM, Fetish & Kinky Community.” The platform has more than a million users and over 20 million videos and photos.
Fetlife does not describe itself as a dating site; it describes itself as a social media platform for those who are interested in the fetish, kinky, and BDSM community. They do not identify themselves as a dating service or even as a hook-up website.
Even though they do not market themselves that way, they are the most sexually charged social media website, and you get to message as many people as you want. They sell themselves as a social media website, “Like Facebook, but run by kinksters.”
When Was It Launched?
Back in 2008, John Kopanas launched Fetlife. His username, John Baku, knows him. It is believed he got frustrated, unable to find a woman who matches sexual interests similar to his. So he created a website in 2007, called “FriendsWithFetishes.”
While he was working on releasing FriendsWith Fetishes 2.0, he made up his mind to launch a different website and went with the name Fetlife. His chief technology officer was James Golick.
Baku received the Community Choice Award (Man), which is a part of the Pantheon of Leather Awards in 2009.
Let’s dig deep and look at the features it offers
To get access to this website, users had to select their gender and create a profile for free. Pick a sexual orientation from the 11 choices they are providing. Then, pick the role that would define them from the platform, like kinkster, swinger, brat, and dominant.
After that, users can post videos and images and write stories that express all of their fantasies. A few of them could even be illegal outside of this community. The basic boundary of the BDSM community depends on communication and consent before you start a session.
However, with time, the website has also come up with a lot of changes. Back in time, a member was allowed to create a group depending on the fetish they had. However, in 2017 January, Fetlife stopped this feature and shut down the ability of members to create groups.
Moreover, they deleted numerous groups that had words like incest, blood, rape, and needles. But they reinstated the ability to form groups shortly afterward. There are numerous groups that answer questions based on themes like “ask a mistress,” “ask a submissive,” or “ask a stripper.”
Along with that, there are separate directories for listing the fetishes to make it easy for the members. But all the members are free to create any fetish.
The members can also post about an event, including the location, date, dress code, and cost, along with other information. They can keep the location hidden as well, meaning it would only be visible to the invited people only.
But What About User Interaction?
The members of this platform are allowed to send messages to other members, just like any other social media platform. Back in 2013, they implemented a chat function that allowed members to send private messages to another member with whom they are friends.
However, in 2016, they discontinued this function, and in 2020, they brought back the feature with a slight change. Now, one member can choose if they want to receive messages from another member, just want to be friends with them, or just follow them.
There is also a separate section that allows people to mention if they are in a relationship or not. And can also mention specifically if they are dominant or submissive. They can send a message if the other person agrees to receive it and send a message to someone else.
All the members can post notes, writings, erotica, and journal entries along with videos and photographs. However, the members are not allowed to post any video or photo that they have not taken themselves or if the video and photographs are not featuring them.
Even though the membership is free, only financial contributors can view the videos. But people are free to view photos, comment on the photos, and posts. However, these comments are public and cannot be altered after they have been posted.
The search feature is actually limited to preventing members with specific characteristics like gender or age. Moreover, it is not possible to find writing with the help of keywords and topics. These are only available through the author’s profile page.
Guidelines And Policies Of Fetlife
Back in 2012, Fetlife had to face a controversy about a policy where users pledged not to “make criminal accusations against another member in a public forum.” The users objected to this policy because they thought that censoring the posts done by sexual assault victims would prevent them from warning others about those predators.
But Fetlife mentioned that if they allow someone to accuse another member of the platform, and then if the allegations are proven to be false, then it could turn out to be libelous. You need an account if you want to view any content on Fetlife.
Search engines do not index this site, and because of this, critics say that Fetlife presents itself as more private than it actually is. Back in 2017, Brendt Christensen killed Yinguing Zhang and looked into the site for topics like “Abduction 101.”
Fetlife Controversies
Fetlife faced criticism for not addressing the amount of racist content on the website and how people involved themselves in these practices. Users who are mainly from non-white communities showed their concerns when the platform did not have a response to this increase in racist content.
The management of Fetlife faced a lot of criticism, as they did not take adequate measures to stop this racism that was continuing on the platform. Even though the terms of service prohibit the promotion of hate or racism, the speech is still prevalent.
John Kopanas, in August 2020, engaged the users in discussing whether they should include “race play” as a category in fetish. This started debates about free speech and the responsibility of the platform to protect its users from harm.
By now, you know what is Fetlife, what are the terms and conditions, and the policies with the features it presents as well. So, if you are also into BDSM, fetishes, and kinks, you should definitely try this one once. But make sure you are responsible and make an informed decision.
You May Also Like..
