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“Why Am I Single?” – Here Are 20 Reasons Why & What You Can Do About It?

“Why Am I Single?” – Here Are 20 Reasons Why & What You Can Do About It?

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“Okay Google: Why Am I Single?”

Google: Right now, the best person for you is you.☺

‘Why I am single?’– This is probably the most asked question in the modern dating industry, and if you are one of those people who are asking this question, it means you definitely don’t want to be single. When you google why I am single, Google advises you that you are the best person for yourself. But we don’t find it satisfying, right? 

So, we have got some answers to your ‘why I am still single?’ question. But, before we get started on that, it’s high time you get over the illusion that you are not complete until you find your better half. We agree that relationships are excellent, and one can’t live happily alone forever, but that doesn’t mean you will start getting depressed just because all your friends are with their special someone, and you are not.

Why Am I Still Single?-Let’s Look At The Reasons

I am single boy, and I am single girl, and I don’t like it-its probably the most common problem of the millennial generation. Now, we may take this problem lightly because we believe you will find your special someone when it’s time. But, if you get depressed about it and fall victim to anxiety issues, that will certainly be a deal-breaker. So, let’s look at a few reasons now behind why I am single.

1: You Probably Haven’t Moved On From Your Ex

The most common reason behind the ‘I am single’ problem is that you have not moved on from your ex yet. You probably thought that you moved on from him, but if you are still uploading I am single photos on Facebook, that means you want your ex to notice how much pain you are in without them.

You may have a notion that these tricks will make your ex contact you again, and you’ll rush back to their arms. But that’s probably not going to happen. So, if you are one of those persons who are still holding on to your ex’s gifts and photos, you have discovered the reason why you are still single. 


We understand that your ex may have broken you, and you need time to heal. So, take time, and when you realize you are over him, plan your next date. In the meantime, you can spend time with your friends and family or plan a solo trip to find yourself.

2: You May Have A Fear Of Intimacy

Most of us say that we want a partner to love us, care for us, and stay with us forever. But, when you come out of a serious relationship, it often breaks you internally, and you don’t want to be intimate with anyone else ever. 

You don’t plan on doing it, but this thought lingers in your subconscious mind so strongly that you end up destroying your potential chances of finding a partner.

Even if you have not come out from a serious relationship, many of us suffer from the fear of intimacy. This problem is more common in teen girls because the thought of making out of sex freaks them out as they don’t have complete knowledge about it. 


Be honest with yourself, and if you find this is why you are still single, we suggest you go to a therapist. You can even talk to a trusted adult who will help you break off this mentality. You can even communicate your fears to your current partner and deal with the problem together.

3: You Don’t Mix With People Much

I am sorry for dropping this bomb on my introvert friends, but it is a primary reason behind your ‘why I am single’ problem. There is nothing wrong with being an introvert, and we are not saying that introverted people don’t find their happily ever afters, but it may take some time.

So, if you want to remove your I am single DP from Facebook, you must go out more and meet new people. Know one thing that your perfect someone won’t magically appear in front of you if you keep on reading romance novels in your room. 


You can start communicating with people on dating apps or social media sites. Talk to them for some time, and then fix a date with them. It will give you an excellent reason to go out too, and when you go out, you automatically increase your chances of finding a partner.

4: You May Be Too Busy

‘Why am I still single at 30?’ So many people have asked me this question over the years, and I have replied to them only one thing. Love needs time, and if you are too much of a workaholic, it’s probably why your past relationships also haven’t worked out.

It’s totally natural that you love to work, and you are used to a busy schedule, but then don’t complain about why I am single issue. If you are complaining about it, that means you also seek refuge from this daily humdrum of life.


First of all, you have to start taking time out for yourself. Once you keep your mind off of things, you’ll notice there are maybe many admirers around you who are waiting for one signal from you. Just give them a chance, and get over the still single issue.

5: Your Self-Esteem Is Too High

If you are in love with your, I am single girl picture, that’s good. But just because you consider yourself perfect doesn’t mean you get to eliminate others’ perspectives from your life. 

So, the reason you are single is probably that you have an inflated sense of self-confidence, which may be toxic for others.

Do you think you do everything right? Do you immediately assume that the other person is not good enough for you? If you have answered YES to these questions, it means your self-esteem is too high. People may not be able to compete with your self-pride, and that’s why you’re still single.


The best way to get over the high self-esteem issue is to talk to your family members, especially your parents or your siblings who know you. Learn from them where you are wrong. You should also try to put yourself in others’ shoes before you pass cruel judgments on them.

6: Your Self-Esteem Is Too Low

Striking a balance in life is essential, and just like high self-esteem, low self-esteem is also an issue in your dating life. If you never think you are good enough for anyone, you’ll not notice the people who take a romantic interest in you. Or worse, if you see it, you’ll wonder what is wrong with them.

While it sounds like a perfect plot for those rom-com movies where the girl suffers from low self-esteem issues, and one day the school heartthrob magically appears to make the girl realize her true worth, it’s not real, and it’s not healthy. So, stop looking for I am single images and improve your confidence.


We think you need some positive relationships in your life that can help build your self-esteem. There must be some things that you are good at, so find those, and keep yourself busy there. Once you get over this problem, your prince charming will undoubtedly appear in front of you.

7: You Are Afraid Of The Competition

Have you watched the movie ‘To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before’? Do you remember how Lara Jean was so afraid of Genevieve that she never confessed her love to Peter? 

Low self-esteem often leads people to believe that they are not good enough, and there is too much competition for the person they like, so they don’t stand a chance. So, as a result, they don’t even try speaking their hearts out.

It’s natural that you don’t want to feel like a fool for not being chosen especially when you are a teenager. But, trust me, that’s okay. You don’t have to step back every time you find the person you are interested in has too many admirers. If you keep up this attitude, you’ll always stay single.


Just find the things you are good at, and find a way to show off your skills to the person you are interested in. Instead of complaining about ‘I’ve been single for so long’ to God, pray for a little more courage, and change the stats of your dating life right now.

8: You Have An Intimidating Personality

Having an intimidating personality may be a good thing for workplace behavior, but it’s not such a plus point when it comes to romance. If you have a lot going on in your life, that often makes you less approachable.

As a result, people never quite gather the courage to ask you out even if they like you. It’s a problem more common in women than men. So, the sad truth is your personality is standing in the way of your ‘I am single’ life.


As much as we believe that the right person will love you for what you are, so you don’t need to change yourself, we think you can do some tiny things to get over the ‘been single for years’ issue. Try to meditate, keep your mind relaxed, practice breathing exercises, and smile more.

9: You Are Too Mysterious

You are not in middle school anymore, so get over that illusion that having a mysterious personality attracts people. People don’t get attracted to someone who shares nothing about them. You have to reveal some vulnerable aspects of your life if you want to connect with someone on a deeper level.

Well, here’s our advice to solve your I am single problem. Instead of being mysterious, try being controversial. Share the uncomfortable parts of your characters, and you may end up finding the person who’ll still want to be with you.


You can always consult a therapist if you have trouble sharing your problems with others. However, if that seems too much, just start sharing small details of your life when you are in a group. It may portray you as a more easygoing person, and people may start asking you out.

10: You Don’t Like Online Dating

When I was googling the reasons why I’m single, I found this to be the reason for my conundrum. I am an old-school person who believes in falling in love with the person and not with his Facebook DP or Insta bio. 

I was happy living my life like this and occasionally complaining to my therapist about why I was always the single friend when my bubble suddenly burst. Then, my best friend got married to a person she met online, and that’s when I realized that online dating could also bring true love.


The solution is pretty simple. You just need to register yourself on online dating apps, make your interests clear so that the person you get matched with knows what you are like. Then, it will likely resolve your always single problem in a flicker.

11: You Are Too Independent

No relationship is perfect. So, you have to compromise a few things and sacrifice a few things if you want to make a relationship work with the person you love. But, always remember it takes two to tango, so you should not be the only one sacrificing.

You have to be flexible so that your partner finds you an adjustable person. It makes people feel that they have a special place in your life too besides your routine. So, stop being so much independent, and why I am single problem will be solved in a snap of a finger.


We think you should learn to be more empathetic towards your partner and find out what they want from you. Communicate with your partner about your decisions, and your forever single life will alter soon enough.

12: You Are Scared Of Commitment

This problem is more common in men than women because being scared of commitment is a character trait they are born with. As long as the relationship is fun, they seem okay with it, but they tend to run away when things take a severe turn. 

So, these scared people are the types of guys who stay single forever. If you have seen Friends, you may associate yourself with Chandler Bing because he always used to break up with his girlfriends for the silliest reason, and that’s because he was scared of commitment.


So, you have to follow Joey Tribbiani’s advice here, who said that if you are afraid of commitment, you should proactively commit. So, just give this idea a shot, and maybe your I am single forever phase will be over soon.

13: You’ve Been Hurt In The Past

Stop complaining about why you are still single if you constantly judge people from your ex’s perspectives. When you have been hurt in the past, it automatically makes you more cautious. But, just because your ex has hurt you doesn’t mean the next person will be a replica, right?

We mean to say that being hurt is part and parcel of a relationship because you can’t find the other person 100% perfect. But, don’t judge the new person from your past experiences. Instead, be open to making new mistakes.

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We are not telling you to wear your heart on your sleeves, but you have to give love a second chance if you don’t want to be single forever. Learn to let things go, and stop blaming others for your pain.

14: You Have Been Dating Too Much

People who believe in the I only want one person mentality sometimes end up dating the wrong people always. While it’s common nowadays to see more than one person because none of you are exclusive, it’s also quite exhausting.

It sometimes takes you to a stage where you don’t expect anything new from a date and end up losing interest in the other person very quickly. If you think this is why you are single, it’s probably time to slow things down a bit.


As we have already mentioned, you need to give yourself a break from these causal dating scenes. Just keep yourself busy with other things, and the right person will appear from the corner.

15: Your Mind Immediately Jumps To Marriage

Why am I alone? It’s a question everyone asks themselves, and just because you are single, considering yourself alone is not the ideal thing to do. Even people who are in meaningless relationships also ask the same question.

Well, one of the reasons for your I am single problem you are always looking for a prospective person to walk down the aisle. Unfortunately, in this rush, you may have ignored the possible chances of having a fun relationship with someone actually interesting.


So, the solution to this problem is hidden in the problem itself. Learn to take things slow, and learn to find a friend within your potential boyfriend/girlfriend. Maybe life will give you something beautiful when you are expecting it the least.

16: You Learn From Sad Couples Around You

Learning from others’ mistakes is a good idea, but that is not a thumb rule for dating. For example, if you have seen too many broken relationships or too many broken marriages in your life, that may have shaped your mind in a way that you don’t trust relationships anymore.

Now, when you can’t trust relationships, how will you ever solve your I’m still single problem? First, you have to give your life a chance to make your own mistakes, and then you’ll truly learn how to make your relationship work.


If you see too many broken relationships around you, just think that they did not find their ideal matches yet. So, have a bit of patience, and you’ll find the right person sooner than ever.

17: You Are Too Picky

If you idolize someone and look for those exact qualities in your soulmate, you will never overcome your I am single phase. You have to accept the person as they are if you want them to take as you are.

Being picky while deciding on your life partner is good because otherwise, you may end up with an incompatible person. But, if you always pick on their silly vices, that will be insulting to them, and they won’t want to be with you.


So, what we mean is that don’t be a perfectionist. Everyone has an individual personality that they want their life partner to cherish. So, try this approach while you date the next person, and you never know how you’ll be surprised.

18: You Prefer Being Single Than Being In The Wrong Relationship

The reason why I am single is that I don’t want to be in the wrong relationship. I have been in relationships before, but being in a bad relationship is never a good idea just to spend your valentines days with someone.

If you also believe in this philosophy, it’s probably best that you are single right now. You don’t need someone else’s validation to complete your life. If you are not a teenager anymore, it’s better to just wait for the right person.


You have to wait for the right person and not rush into things, as I have said before. In the meantime, you can make plans with your single ladies so that you don’t feel so alone on valentine’s Day.

19: You Were Not Ready

Most relationships break up when two people staying in a relationship want different things from it. So, your ‘I am single problem feels like a problem to you right now because when you were in a relationship, you were not ready for a lot of stuff that your partner wanted from you.

It’s common to feel the peer pressure of dating when you are in middle school or college. But if you are past those phases in your life, you probably already know that those relationships didn’t work out because you weren’t ready.


If you have understood this problem, it means you are halfway there. So, just let your potential dating partners know that you are ready this time and jump into it.

20: They Were Not Ready

Now, it’s time to look at the other side of the coin. Another reason you are single or have a commitment phobia is that you were in a relationship where the other person was not ready to give in.

Just because that person was not ready doesn’t mean the next person won’t be too. As we keep on saying, stop judging everyone from your ex’s perspective, and you will notice some beautiful things in life.


The reason why you haven’t found your ideal connection is not that something is wrong with you. So, stop blaming yourself, and enjoy life as it comes. You will find your soulmate soon.

To Conclude

We have stated 20 reasons so that your ‘Why I am single’ problem can be resolved. We have also mentioned the solutions to all those problems, so start applying them now. If any of these solutions click for you, let us know below. If you want to know more about it, you can also post your questions in the comment box.

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