To simply assume that every person who actually identifies as a lesbian is kinda insulting. Similarly, categorizing different types of lesbians is also weird. Yes, every person identifying as a lesbian is unique on their own – based on their social groups, preferences, upbringing, and identity.
The best part? We live in a world that recognizes the different groups under the whole LGBTQ+ community. So familiarizing yourself with the different types of lesbians you are likely to meet in real life is a good idea, especially in 2023.
If you are still wondering why you should? Well, why not? It doesn’t matter whether you stick straight or queer or just explore. Today, let’s talk about the truth behind labels – the types of lesbians you are likely going to come across in real life. Stay tuned to find out more.
Aren’t All Lesbians The Same?
Nope.
If you actually walked upto to someone who identified as a lesbian that you thought everyone was the same, they would be pretty insulted. And they have every right to feel insulted.
Just ask yourself – is everyone who identifies as a straight person the same? Not really! Are all queer people the same? Still no! We are unique individuals in our own light, and this includes how we choose to live, who we love, and how we lead our lives.
While there are different types of lesbians, not everyone identifies with specific sub-cultures.
Some might just change their minds occasionally and even move from one group to another group or just identify with more than one group. It entirely depends on personal preferences.
The Problem With Lesbian Labels:
While we are pretty familiar with the usual lesbian types and, more importantly, stereotypes like femmes and butches, the actual spectrum is more complicated than the same.
That being said, it is vital not to become very obsessed with labels, especially lesbian labels, and what they indicate about people who identify as lesbians. When you focus on labels too much, it can easily cause feelings of isolation – it might make you feel like you actually do not fit in.
You might feel the pressure to look, act, and even dress in a certain way if you really want to be an accepted member of the queer community.
According to the typical lesbian aesthetics, it is natural to feel that you are losing brownies points initially in the community because you have slept with a man in the past – but of course, stuff like this is ridiculous.
Irrespective of your past or where you are located on the queer spectrum, if you identify as a lesbian, then you ARE one – as long as you believe it, it’s fine!
It is also possible that you might feel that you don’t really fit into any particular category – one day, you might feel more like a tomboy, and the other day, you might feel more like a femme.
You need to remember identity and sexuality can be absolutely fluid, irrespective of what people might let you know.
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The Types Of Lesbians You’re Most Likely To Meet IRL!
So, what are the different types of lesbians you are likely to encounter in real life? Without wasting time, scroll down and check out the types of lesbians you will come across in real life – of course, it is impossible to talk about every type because it’s pretty subjective at this point.
Naturally, it’s better to talk about the most common types – stay tuned to find out more!
1. The Lipstick Or Femme Lesbian:
A fem lesbian is simply someone who is on the most feminine part of the spectrum. You will come across words like ‘lipstick lesbian’ or even ‘femme’ being used interchangeably, but they typically refer to the same types.
2. The Butch Lesbian:
Not everyone who identifies as a lesbian is a typical masc lesbian, but that doesn’t mean Lesbians with masculine traits don’t exist. Butch lesbians are known for challenging the stereotypical male gender roles in society.
3. The Chapstick Lesbian:
If femme and butch lesbians are on the opposite ends of the spectrum, then the chapstick lesbian community is situated right in the center. Typically easygoing, these lesbians are neither hyperfeminine nor hypermasculine. They are strong and independent but with soft edges – hence the name chapstick as opposed to lipstick.
4. The Stone-Butch Lesbian:
Now that you know what is a chapstick lesbian, let’s talk about the other types of lesbians. Stone-Butch lesbians are basically butch lesbians but with more masculinity in terms of their demeanor and appearance. The word ‘stone’ basically refers to the labels that indicate sexual and emotional boundaries.
5. The Stone-Femme Lesbian:
Stone-femme lesbians are basically lesbians who use the ‘stone-femme’ label to indicate both emotional and sexual boundaries. Stone-femme lesbians are traditionally feminine in their approach to life and appearance.
6. The Pillow Princess Lesbian:
If you get into bed with a muscular lesbian, or any other type of lesbian for that matter, and all you do is enjoy receiving pleasure, but without any reciprocation – then you are a pillow princess. It’s a slang often used for describing women who only enjoy receiving pleasure and clearly not reciprocation.
7. The Boy-Babe Lesbian:
Boy-babe lesbians are not your usual masculine, rough lesbians – these lesbians are masculine, but they are more juvenile with a ‘boyish’ appearance. They are pretty eccentric and enjoy taking up typical male gender roles in romantic relationships. They usually sport hair that’s short and flowy – think Justin Bieber’s hair!
8. The Alternative Lesbian:
Alternative lesbians are women who have alternative tastes in both fashion and other areas – think innovative outfits, tattoos, dyed hair, rock music – yep, that’s your usual alternative lesbians. Although she might appear to be tough she is just a free-spirited woman who loves having a good time.
9. The Lug
LUG is an abbreviation for ‘lesbian until graduation.’ Just like hasbians, Lugs are women who are lesbians for a temporary phase in their lives before moving to a different sexual orientation.
They are typically seen as tourists who experiment with making out with women during their college or high school years. However, ultimately, these women do not stay lesbians throughout their lives.
Moreover, if you are in a bar and hear any woman being called a lug, chances are its a compliment. Generally, Lugs are a kind of lesbian who is seen with skepticism and dismissal.
10. The Sport Dyke:
The sport dyke is a lesbian who loves mixing it up – more than anything; such women describe themselves as athletes.
For instance, basketball star Seimone Augustus or legendary soccer champion Abby Wambach – these competitive women obsess over a certain sport, and they might also have some masculine traits. However, their gender preference is typically that of a woman.
11. The Baby Dyke:
Baby dykes, or dykes in training, are absolutely new to this whole lesbian thing. Instead of other kinds of lesbians, no specific fashion or rather look happens to be assigned to them. Moreover, the main attribute of a baby dyke is they have come out as a queer lady and are making a debut in the LGBTQ community for the first time. Sounds cute, right?
12. The Gold Star Lesbian:
Some lesbian labels are not that flattering, but the Gold Star Lesbian is basically meant to be a sort of honor for lesbians. As per QueersUnited, the gold star lesbian is “a lesbian who has never had sexual relations with a man and does not intend to.”
The gold star lesbian is through and through gay – and they are proud of their sexuality. This type of lesbian is sure about their identity and has proven solid in her gender as well as sexual identity.
And That’s A Wrap!
And that’s a wrap on the different types of lesbians you will meet in real life. Now, tell us what your thoughts are. Are you confused, or were we able to give you some clarity about the different lesbian types? Feel free to share your thoughts, past experiences, and stories related to our primary theme in the comments below.
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Barsha Bhattacharya is a senior content writing executive. As a marketing enthusiast and professional for the past 4 years, writing is new to Barsha. And she is loving every bit of it. Her niches are marketing, lifestyle, wellness, travel and entertainment. Apart from writing, Barsha loves to travel, binge-watch, research conspiracy theories, Instagram and overthink.