I first heard about the hero instinct while reading about men and why they behave the way they do. Yes, men are essentially from Mars, and women are from Venus, but trust me, that has nothing to do with the hero instinct. So I remember how it all started!
I was dating this guy who was completely useless and would always inevitably get mad about people – an aggressive man who always wanted to ‘fix’ my life and ‘save’ me. So, when the relationship thankfully ended, I was left confused and relieved. I was relieved that it was finally over but confused about this guy’s unique personality.
And like most of you, I am also awake at 1 am reading up on strange psychological issues, and hero instinct was one of those issues. This was four years ago – since then, I have had the opportunity to closely observe this instinct in men. And the things I ended up discovering have made my love life so simple!
You just have to tick around till the very end to find out all that you need to know about this instinct.
Exploring Hero Instinct In Men: But Wait, What Is Hero Instinct?
Simply put, the hero instinct in men has a lot to do with the innate desire to save and protect everyone they love. It can be defined as a primal and powerful urge that drives men toward keeping their loved ones safe. It’s a completely biological drive that makes men feel like a hero!
So, that urge that drives Spiderman to jump off a building, trying to save his Mary Jane? That urge has nothing to do with him being an actual superhero – you could say his hero instinct got the better of him, and he just can’t help himself.
If you are still thinking about what the hero instinct is, let me tell you: All men are born with this drive. However, while some men are more open about it or get triggered easily, some men take time – I like to call them late bloomers, and those men are exactly my type. See, I don’t want some man’s help every time I am in trouble – so if your man is a late bloomer, then you profit twice!
Here’s how it can prove to be beneficial!
- Your man’s desire to save you doesn’t mess with your independence to make your decisions and provides you the space to make your own mistakes. When you make mistakes, you learn and grow from them.
- If you are worried about awakening the hero instinct in your man, then you need not worry, considering you can always trigger this instinct in your man – so the power becomes yours. Therefore, you can practically decide when you want the instinct to be triggered and not compromise your independence.
First coined by James Bauer, a relationship expert, hero instinct primarily depends on fulfilling a few biological drivers that most men have,
- Like the desire to feel needed,
- Like the need to feel respected,
- Like the instinct to live a life that’s meaningful and has a purpose.
So, without wasting any more time, let’s check out all the ways in which you can trigger the hero instinct in your man!
Awakening The Hero Instinct In Your Man: The Damsel In Distress Is Here!
Since you are already here and have managed to stick around, you obviously want to find out what triggers emotional attraction in a man – you just have to become a damsel in distress. And I am here to help you do that – simply scroll down and find out all that you need to know.
Appreciate Him:
Express your appreciation and gratitude for him. Let your crush know that his efforts are not going unappreciated or unnoticed. While depending on any external source of validation at any time is not recommended, timely approval from someone’s partner can help them significantly.
You will be able to boost your man’s self-esteem with your praises. He will feel loved, appreciated, and valued when you are able to admire him. Besides triggering your man’s hero instinct, appreciating your partner is a characteristic of any healthy relationship.
For instance, after he has an exhausting day at work, he appreciates how good he is at his job. You can say something like, “I love how hard you work, and I am proud of what you have achieved.” If he picks you up from work, try saying something like, “Thank you, babe, for picking me up today. I love you.”
Be Careful During Rough Patches:
While you are resolving conflict with your partner, do not fight all that he is telling you. Even if you have to disagree, put an effort to actually understand him. Most importantly, you need to show him that you actually want this relationship to work and not just get mad because things are not really going your way.
Don’t forget to let your partner know that you guys are on the same team. During a fight, you might feel disgruntled or even disappointed, for that matter – and all that is fair. But at the same time, you should try to put in some effort to show your partner that you support the relationship.
In case he thinks that you are actually hyper-independent and you will never put his needs first, he will lose interest completely since it can feel like you don’t really love or care about him.
Challenge Him:
Men are often really hard to understand, but one thing’s sure – men love good challenges. And this has nothing to do with playing hard to get. Yes, it works during those initial days, but once the relationship starts, men do not want to chase. Instead, they are looking for someone engaging.
So how do you challenge him?
For instance, you can give your man a task, something that won’t be very easy to execute, or start small by sharing your issues with him – make him give you some advice. The crux of the matter is you have to make him participate in different problem-solving activities to trigger his hero instinct.
Turn To Your Man For Help:
I am a feminist, and most of the time, I help myself. But asking your boyfriend to help you with something has nothing to do with compromising your independence. I am not asking you to literally become a damsel-in-distress, but who said you couldn’t act like one from time to time? Become a damsel in need of help and watch your man save the day with such gusto.
So the next time you find yourself struggling with that jar, simply ask your man to open it for you! This is important because in order to feel needed, your man must feel like you need his help. And when he does help you out, make sure…scroll down to read more!
Praise Your Man:
Yes, when he does help you out, make sure you shower him with praise. If your man has a praise kink, then I can assure you that showering praises on him for doing something mundane can only make your life in the bedroom exciting. Keeping that aside, you have to understand how men love compliments too. There’s literally no difference.
Just make sure that your praises are genuine.
I mean, there’s no need to tell him that he looks great every single time he walks inside a room. While I am always an ally to the whole #womensupportingwomen, let me tell you the point of triggering a man’s hero instinct is to basically make him see you in a way that is different from how he sees anyone else.
Send Him The 12-Worded Text:
You must have come across the concept of the 12-word text, but that’s the thing about these texts! I mean, you don’t need to google ‘hero instinct 12 word text free.’ You can literally make up 12-worded texts that can trigger your man’s hero instinct with ease. It all started with James Bauer and his book ‘His Secret Obsession’ – I mean, the book has the actual text!
But you need to find out the solution to ‘hero instinct 12 word text revealed’ because it’s all inside your head. No matter how independent we are, all of us know how to be a damsel in distress, especially in a world largely dominated by patriarchy.
Allow That Masculine Energy To Flow:
Most often, masculine energy is confused with the more popular toxic masculinity. I know, it’s real, but what is healthy masculinity?
Here’s what healthy masculinity looks like.
- Embodies integrity,
- Goal-driven and assertive,
- Protects loved ones,
- Stays motivated and focused,
- Earns respect.
And that’s not all! Allowing that masculine energy to flow has a lot to do with creating a safe space within your relationship. Your man needs to be vulnerable and expressive about his emotions. So it’s not just about hiding his emotions or being a classic bad boy. It’s also about embracing his masculinity and that too for self-betterment.
Let Him Protect You:
A man’s whole desire is so much more than just protecting you when the need arises. It’s so much more than just acting like a superhero. It’s a lot about holding your hand just ever so lightly while crossing a road. Also, it’s a lot about putting his hand on the small of your back when he feels defensive. It’s a lot about standing up for yourself when the need arises.
For instance, remember that one time when you got catcalled? And your man just couldn’t stay shut? Yes, that was not him acting overprotective – this was his primal instinct telling him he needed to protect you! You don’t need to google ‘primal instincts meaning’ to understand what it refers to. You can see it in his eyes every time he starts acting overprotective.
- Keep Him On His Toes:
- Let Him Take Care Of You:
- Be Real With Him:
And It’s A Wrap!
Are you already busy googling ‘hero instinct text examples’ or something similar? Stop right now because you’ll find everything you need to trigger your man’s hero instinct. You will come across several blogs online telling you about fifty methods, but why use so many methods? You don’t want an overprotective boyfriend irritating you all day long.
So tell us, what do you think about triggering your man’s hero instinct? Tell us about your thoughts and experience related to the same in the comments below.
Additional Reading:
