Long term relationship is a funny thing. Two people stay together more because it has become a habit than love. While some people make do with this reality, I personally was never ready for this. As a result, I have come up with some very important sex rules that couples in long-term relationships can follow.
Long Term Relationship Dynamics
When a couple lives together for a long enough time, things start becoming more routine and according to schedule. While some things become easy, most other things can become monotonous after a while. This is what we call ‘losing the spark.’
Even though the sound of the phenomena is scary, do not worry. It is not like a permanent thing that you need to worry about if you know what to do. In fact, several relationship experts believe that this is a normal thing. In fact, it is a phase that every relationship goes through.
During this phase, there can be a lot of different things that you can do in order to bring the spark back. And one of the aspects that you need to look at is the sexual romance aspect of the whole engagement. You need to have clarity about the right moves and the things to do in order to bring that freshness back into your sexual life.
Therefore, today we will help you understand some of the most important and essential aspects of sexual health in a long term relationship.
Sex Rules For Long Term Relationship
Before we start off our list, I just want to say that the rules that we are about to discuss are not hard and fast. Therefore, you should decide what works for you in the long run.
Find Your Porn
Well, this is something that people might lambast me for, but porn is a great motivator. In fact, talking about your porn choices and favorite porn genre can be quite illuminating. This will also help the other person to bare it all and explain their preferences and choices in porn. This can open a whole world of exploration for both of you and make porn-watching an intimate activity in itself. Bring some champagne and strawberries to the table to mix things up.
For those of you who do not know, Kamasutra is a Hindu literary text that explores different facets of sex. Apart from its readability, the book is also like a Pandora’s box when it comes to sex. I would define Kamasutra as a book that combines yoga with sex. The intricate sex positions and definition of a sexual act are something that will get both of you quite hot and heavy. Just remember to stretch before you give it a try.
Cut The Quickies Out
Hear me out first. I know quickies are the best. They are easy on the clock, and you guys can get back to your daily life once you are done and dusted. However, this can become a habit. Having too many quickies or only quickies will suck the very joy out of your sexual life. It is okay to have a quickie before work or at the party. But while you guys are under the same roof, do not make quickie the norm of the day. A human body is like a musical instrument, you must take your time playing with it.
Do Not Use Sex To Resolve All Conflicts
Long-term couples often are guilty of using sex as a conflict resolution tactic. While I do agree that make-up sex feels amazing, using it as the sole conflict-resolution technique can make sex feel like a chore. I personally believe that long-term couples should first resolve all the conflicts they are facing and then go on to have that amazing make-up sex while things are still a little hostile. This adds spice. But jumping onto the bed right after a fight is detrimental and counter-productive. The issues will not be solved, they will only get pushed back. Which will result in further resentment.
Create A Whole Menu
We all love a full-course menu. It feels amazing to explore food in stages and variations. Then why not make a full menu of your sex life? While this sounds artificial to some conservative people, me and my partner enjoy our sex in stages. My partner and I start off with appetizers (kisses, foot massages, blindfold, touching over clothes). Then we proceed to the main course (cunnilingus, fellatio, sucking nipples, using sex toys). After that, we top it off with desserts (spanking, cuddling, back rubs). This makes the whole act of sex much more than penetration.
You cannot enjoy sex with your partner if you are not physically attracted to them. You have been with your partner for a long while now. You know which parts make them ticklish and which parts make them go all out, beast. Use this knowledge. Create a body map of your partner and ask your partner to do the same. Me and my partner enjoy cannabis while having sex. Sometimes, we would be absolutely naked in front of each other and play with our bodies while smoking up. This usually turns out to be foreplay, but sometimes we do it just for the heck of it and then end up cuddling naked.
Non-Sexual Touches Are Important As Well
We have been discussing about sex for a while. However, we must never discount the power of non-erogenous touches of non-sexual touches. Sometimes, touch your part without the intention of having sex. I enjoy spanking my partner’s butt while she is doing the most random things, at the same time, I enjoy spanking her butt while having sex. While both touches are similar, one is non-erogenous in nature. Not every touch should come with a sexual expectation or baggage.
Switch Up The Schedule
A long term relationship often dwindles down to convenience and schedule. While this is a part and parcel of our lives, however, we must not let it take over our sexual lives. Consider switching things up and having random sexcapades. Drive over to their workplace and have a random quickie. Or make time to have sex before you guys leave for a wedding party. Or you can even have a quickie at a party. This will help you combat monotony and bring that pizzazz back into your sexual life.
The End Note
There you go, here are some of the most important sex rules that you must follow if you are in a long term relationship. But at the very core of things, you need to understand that a relationship is made up of a lot of facets and requires attention and care at every level of it. Understand what is lacking and work on it if you want to make things work out in the end.
Samik has been a literature student all along and uses his fluidity to write about multi-niche topics. Aspiring to be a professional writer, he tries to analyze his topic from a critical standpoint but still adds a hint of personal perspective to the end product. Being a person having a general inclination toward global politics and documentary filmmaking, he also wishes to write and document more about numerous conflicts that are brewing in the different corners of the globe.