Red flags in a relationship are not the same as not liking something about your partner. At the minimum, red flags can leave you with a very bitter taste after a first date, or at the maximum, they can give you PTSD long after the relationship is over.
So, you should be aware of them and ensure that you do not miss them. Avoiding red flags is not a wise decision, no matter how good the relationship feels right now.
What Is A Red Flag?
A red flag is an emoji that came up after the ‘red flag’ emoji went viral on Twitter. It is a warning or danger sign (hence red!) that you are not with the right person. So, what’s your red flag? Share with us, and spread the warning.
Meanwhile, here is our list of red flags for you!
Red Flags In The Beginning
Giant red flags are staring at your face, and it is better for you not to ignore them. So let us start with the major red flags of the first date.
First Date Red Flags!
🚩 They are always ordering your drinks or food. But there is one thing about giving advice and recommendation and literally ordering it for you.
🚩 Commenting on the calorie count on order (fake an emergency phone call right now).
🚩 The silent kind who is just nodding and giving literally no opinion. They are either trying to play too nice or are bored.
🚩 If they do not care about your opinion when choosing a place, are you sure you should even go on a date? Going to the sketchy bar just to impress this guy you have a crush on.
🚩 Bring the ex talk…ohhhhh!…run!
🚩 Rude to the waiter…run faster!
🚩 Doesn’t respect your boundary and persist in doing something you already voiced disapproval off. These are some of the important red flags which shouldn’t be ignored.
🚩 They are complaining too much.
🚩 They are extremely open about their feelings. Now, many might say that this is a good thing. However, when a man shares too much on their first date, it is never a good sign. A quality man or woman will wait to know you before making you privy to some of their deepest secrets.
🚩 They are often on their phones or taking too many calls. But, hey! Excusing yourself for one call is okay, but we all want someone who is present on the date.
🚩 They are more interested in talking about themselves than asking about you. These are generally the narcissistic kind who believe they are doing you a favor by coming to this date.
🚩 Bringing up sex so early on. It is not that sex is a taboo or a *hush* *hush* subject. But, the first date when you are just getting to know each other is not the right time. Especially if you have never met the individual and this is a blind date.
Red Flags After First Sex!
Before we continue with the list, let us just say if you have dealt with any, we understand how difficult it is. But, do not regret but rather learn. It is not you who is in the wrong.
🚩 They do not give a single f*** about your pleasure or your orgasm.
🚩 Won’t give a head, but would want a head and even force you to give one.
🚩 Blame you for your lack of sex drive when they are the ones who do not want any foreplay and just get into it.
🚩 Do not give a f*** about your boundaries. If they are pushing you too hard, immediately leave the house. Or, it is better to always call the person in your house. It is a safer option.
🚩They give a peculiar or backhanded comment on your body. It is okay if you lose your turn after that; you should!
🚩 When they try to explore your body too much without asking for consent or even discussing it before. These major and uncomfortable red flags are not worth ignoring.
🚩They do not like you giving feedback once the act is over.
🚩They immediately leave the bed when they are done. Or, start dressing up once they are done. You shouldn’t continue with this person because if this continues, it could be mentally scarring for you.
🚩You get the ‘ick’ because they have said something during the date.
🚩They do not practice safe sex. Rather make it your responsibility.
🚩Them being nice only when you are having sex is not proof of them being nice person.
🚩They do not make eye contact.
Red Flags In The Middle
Red flags can approach when you are in a relationship. Yes, trust is important, but so is looking out for yourself. Sometimes, when you are wearing rose-colored glasses at the beginning of the relationship, all the red flags just look like flags.
🚩When they are micromanaging your life and trying to control some parts of it. It is common for you not to approve of it. However, there is a difference between protecting someone and not respecting their decision by thinking they are too weak.
🚩Addiction and substance abuse which they are in major denial.
🚩Their anger can sometimes be a danger to them and everyone around them. Although it calms down later, it doesn’t mean you should be ignoring these red flags.
🚩There is a heavy air of codependency where you both cannot handle your own emotional baggage and malfunctions but only need each other to deal with it. This is why therapy and dealing with your own shortcomings are more important before getting into a relationship.
🚩They have an utter dislike for their friends and relatives, no matter their gender. Most importantly, they want you to stay away from them. They will try to sweet talk and lure you into how you should spend all your time with them.
🚩Remember, abuse is not just physical but emotional and verbal. Just because they do not raise their hand on you doesn’t mean you are not in an abusive relationship.
🚩They do not trust you, no matter what you do. This red flag could also be a sign that they are doing something untrustworthy. Or, they are simply too insecure to trust you.
🚩They are always showing their low-self esteem and, in a way seeking constant validation from your end.
There are some red flags that you should never ignore. Getting out of a long-term relationship could be difficult. These red flags in a relationship can even make you feel stuck.
Seek out help from a friend or therapist to cope, and eventually leave the situation because relationships like these can give you major PTSD.
Red Flags In Long-Distance Relationships
Red flags are common in any relationship, and here are some common ones you cannot miss out on in a long-distance relationship.
🚩When was the last time you face time with them?
🚩Is it possible for someone to always be busy?
🚩They do not initiate anything from their end.
🚩They keep missing out on your virtual dates.
🚩Communication has started to feel exhausting from their end. It always feels like they are absent, and you must keep dragging the words out.
🚩Even though you do not see each other, whenever you do, you are always arguing.
🚩They hardly talk about their feelings to you, and neither do they talk about their life outside the relationship.
🚩When you talk about your feelings, they are always trying to gaslight you by saying you are an overthinker.
Long-distance relationship red flags don’t always have to be a partner being dishonest. It could just be your partner growing you out because of the lack of proximity. Although sad, it is not uncommon.
Funny Red Flags
To end the discussion about red flags, we want to keep it a little light-hearted. So, these are some of the funny red flags which we gathered from the internet.
- When they say that they are best friends with their ex.🚩
- ‘I do not like Harry Potter’ is a pretty big red flag. 🚩
- When they start calling you ‘love’ or ‘babe’ before even the first date is over.🚩
- You wear your mask not to kiss at the end of the night, and they still manage to lean. 🚩
- When they try to read your zodiac chart. 🚩
- Talking about the wage gap and why you shouldn’t split the bill.🚩
- When they put pineapples on their pizza…run!🚩
Additional Reading:
Deepanwita has always considered writing as the ultimate weapon to share every thought an individual ambles through. For her writing is not just an activity it’s a motivation for the scarred mind. She loves writing in genres like fashion, lifestyle, literature etc.